Groundhog Day

I noticed this critter behind my house one day when I was going to fill my water jug to water the plants I have on my back porch. I walked through my backyard and stopped short just around the corner. I did not recognize the little guy and he seemed to have the same reaction. He stood up on his hind legs and we stared at each other for a few seconds. At the time I was not sure what kind of critter he was, and he obviously did not recognize my species from the many other creatures in the woods behind my house. This staring contest lasted only a few seconds before he scampered away under the fence. This was the first time I saw him and I thought it would be a one time event. It turns out that this critter, which I now know is a groundhog, has made my backyard a playground.

I see him all the time now. He seems to like the area beside my house and will duck his head out from under the fence to make sure the coast is clear before he comes out. I was able to snap one picture of him from my spare bedroom before he ducked back under the fence. Not a great picture, but I doubt he and I will be driving down the road like Bill Murray and Punxatawney Phil anytime soon, so this will have to do. Can you even imagine? Me and Phil's Oklahoma cousin cruising down the open road.

Speaking of, the movie Groundhog Day is one of my favorites, which makes it even weirder to me that I did not know what kind of animal this was the first time I saw it. To tell you the truth, I think this is the only time I have ever seen one in person. Every other time has been that movie or when the real Phil comes out to forecast the coming of Spring. I knew it was far too big to be a prairie dog. The lack of tail and the continent we live on helped me to rule out nutria as well. I really did think it might be a nutria. What was I thinking? I was talking about it at work one day and someone said "it might be a groundhog." Novel idea, huh? I googled some groundhog pictures and quickly realized that was what I was dealing with.

If I get some more pictures I will post them. I guess I should come up a fancy name for him too. Tahlequah Tom? Tahlequah Teddy? Cherokee Charlie? Time will tell.

Flux Capacitor

I wish I was handy. I think we all know someone who is the ultimate handy man. I have many in my family, but that is certainly one of my recessive genes. All the men in my family seem to be good at fixing, remodeling, and working through any major or minor home repairs. I suppose the case could be made that we are all pretty handy judging by the gifts we hand make and exchange at our family Christmas every year. Home made gifts are one thing, remodeling your master bathroom like my cousin Jake is another. If our family members were TV characters, Jake would be MacGyver. I would probably be more like Tim "the Tool Man" Taylor or a cartoon character with no opposable thumbs. Seriously, Jake remodeled he and Kristi's bathroom and it is awesome.

Regardless of whether I can actually fix anything or not, I wish I knew the lingo to make it sound like I did. My air conditioning recently went out so I called my landlord and he had someone out the next day to fix it. He called me to let me know it was fixed and that the _________ had gone out. Wondering why that last sentence had a blank? Me too. He told me what part went out and was subsequently replaced, but I of course deleted that vital bit of information from my brain. I mentioned to DeWayne that my air conditioning was working again later that day at work. Of course he responded with "what was wrong with it?" Knowing this question was probably on the horizon, I prepared my standard answer. "Flux capacitor."

Many of you may realize that the only machine that uses a flux capacitor is the time traveling DeLorean from Back to the Future. I may not know much, but I know nothing I am in contact with on a day to day basis is fueled by plutonium. I do know that aside from getting my oil changed, replacing a fuse or anything to do with my alternator, all other car problems have to do with the flux capacitor. Computer crashed? Flux capacitor. Water heater out? Flux capacitor. Problems with appliances, lawnmowers and all things electronic? Flux capacitor.

Will I ever gain some handy man knowledge? Survey says........probably not. Let's face it, I am almost 30 and soaking up new knowledge from a topic I really do not care that much about it unlikely. Maybe I am wrong. I doubt I will ever replace the motor in my car, but perhaps I will learn to grout and tile a bathroom someday. I guess time will tell. Until then, the flux capacitor specialists will continue to be a phone call away.

A Room with a View

I have spent the 4th of July in many places over my 29 years, but I just do not think any will ever compare to the collective years when I spent my 4th's on Main Street in Panhandle. I cannot recall ever having a bad time at any 4th of July, but the ones spent in Panhandle are certainly closest to my heart.

For those of you who have never been to the 4th of July festivities in Panhandle, you really should plan a trip for next year. I try to be there at least every other year. If you are planning to come next year and are not able to drive, you can fly into Amarillo International airport and I will pick you up. Two start accommodations can be found at the Double N Motel, nestled between the Dairy Queen and the always open, but ever name changing mexican restaurant. No need for a wake up call, as you will be gently greeted in the morning by a few rays of sunshine and a 50 mph hour locomotive which runs behind the hotel. It is delightful. The Texan Motel, a Panhandle legacy, is the other option. It is located just off Main Street. This is an older establishment, but just as charming. A few of the rooms have bathrooms, but the rest share a community restroom. If you feel like stepping back into your college dorm days then this is definitely the place for you.

The 4th of July celebration day is always a great time in Panhandle. The day starts with a parade down Main Street. To tell you the truth, I have not seen the parade in years. We have a 1973 Volkswagon Bug that we always drive in the parade, so anytime I am home I am in the parade. Pretty much anyone can be in the parade. If you have a farm implement, you can be in the parade. If you have a classic car or just one you think is "classic", you can be in the parade. If you decorate a golf cart with streamers and other red white and blue paraphernalia, you can be in the parade and possibly win a prize. And if you drive a comically small car and wear a fez atop your head, you too can be in the parade.

The parade ends at the court house where a multitude of foods are ready to wreak havoc on your cholesterol. Funnel cakes, turkey legs, corn dogs, and almost anything else you can fry. Mostly fair food, but all the good kinds. Not even Templeton the rat could resist this veritable smorgasbord.

Then the show begins. The variety of acts at the courthouse is what makes the all day affair so enticing. Who can resist a little Miss and Mister contest? Well, it is shockingly easy for someone without kids. At some point the ill prepared, but well meaning, junior high and high school cheerleaders will perform, which always gets the crowd going. Several other acts come and go each year, but only one performance that occurs at 3:00 p.m. really packs the courthouse lawn. This particular group is made fun of and quietly heckled until their flurry of feet hit the stage. The Amarillo Cloggers are always the biggest attraction to be seen at the Panhandle 4th of July celebration. As much as well all make fun of them leading up to their performance, we all seem to gather on the lawn just in time to see them perform.

Not all of the action takes place on the courthouse lawn. This brings me to the title of this blog. My dad Leslie's cousin Hal has an office on Main Street, just a few blocks south of the courthouse. One day a year this becomes The Viewing Room. My parents, Hal, his wife and lots of their friends gather and watch the parade from the lawn chairs they tote inside. This allows them to enjoy the parade with air conditioning.......and adult beverages that might be frowned upon while kids are gathering candy on Main Street. Mimosas and Bloody Mary's flow while they watch from what can only be described as a two way mirror. The front of Hal's office is floor to ceiling glass that is mirrored on the street side. People constantly stop and check themselves in the "mirror," even more so on a busy day like the 4th. I made it back down to the viewing room just after the parade ended last year. Lots of people are still out on the street making their way down to the courthouse. No one seems to realize that someone might be on the other side of the glass. We saw people check their hair, pop a zit, have an argument with each other and even pick their nose. It is amazing what people will do when they think no one is looking. When the nose picker stopped by we all stopped talking and stared. She checked herself in the mirror first, lifting her head a little and flaring her nostrils. Nothing seemed to be there on our side. She checked to her left and then her right. Then she raised her finger and started mining. We collectively said "Ohhhhh" and roared with laughter. Apparently the mirror was not sound proof as she quickly realized someone might be on the other side of the glass. She put her hand back in her pocket, tucked her tail between her legs and quickly walked away leaving us with fading laughter and a great 4th of July story.

It turns out that Hal may move his office to his home, so this year may have been the last 4th of July viewing. Hopefully this is mere conjecture and not the ugly truth. I know each of you reading hopes we can meet next year on Main Street in Panhandle. Bring your chairs and your favorite cocktails and we will enjoy the air conditioning and good company from a room with a view.